What should you do when you just started a new job…and quickly realize it’s not the one for you? Unfortunately, there are a number of reasons that a job might feel like a total let-down: your commute takes forever, your job doesn’t match the job description, you’re bored, your boss is intimidating, you constantly have to work late, something else entirely…or all of the above.
If you’re panicking because your dream job seems to be a total nightmare, you aren’t alone. A recent Monster survey found that 32 percent of people aged 18 to 24 have had two jobs where they don’t think they are a good fit for the role or the company. It can be tricky to decide if quitting is the right decision — it takes time to get used to a new job. But if you realize it’s truly not for you, how do you put in your two weeks’ notice when you’re just a few weeks or months into the gig? I spoke to career experts to get their take.
TBH, give it a minute:
Take time to reflect on why you want to quit your job. It can take time to adjust and feel comfortable when you start something new, especially when you are moving up a level on the office totem pole, and that can be frustrating. You might feel like you’ll never be successful, which is scary and also probably not true.
“I think many people get disenfranchised pretty quickly in their jobs, often because they simply aren’t good at them yet. This idea that you feel passionate about your work when you arrive doesn’t map to my experience or the experience of a lot of people I know,” says Sean Johnson, an assistant professor at Northwestern University, “There’s a learning curve — it takes a while to figure out how to do really well in a job. The passion often comes from mastering your craft, not before.”
When students ask him for advice about whether they should quit that brand new job, he tells them to try to stick it out until they have time to get good at it. “If they still hate it, they can move. But too many people flit from thing to thing and never dig into becoming really good at anything,” says Johnson.
See if it is salvageable:
It is tempting to hand in your two weeks’ notice without actually bringing up your concerns. But you don’t want to quit a job that could be great by avoiding advocating for what you need. Sure, you might not be able to change some things like the length of your commute, but some things are negotiable.
“Start by talking with your boss, and see how he or she responds. If it appears that your manager doesn’t care about your concerns, I would start looking elsewhere,” says Christopher Lee, founder of the San Diego-based career consulting company Purpose Redeemed.
If the problem is late nights at the office, maybe you can start earlier and leave in time to have a personal life. If it’s that the job doesn’t seem to match the job description, see if you can shift some of your day-to-day responsibilities. If your co-workers seem standoffish, try to make one work friend or make the first move in getting to know your colleagues. There may be ways to make it a good fit for a while, or even just until you’ve got your next job lined up.
Think about the pros and cons:
When the Sunday Scaries last all week and your miserable from 9-5 or 9-whenever-you-can-finally-leave-the-office, it is hard not to get down on yourself. You might wonder how you missed the red flags, but blaming yourself isn’t going to make things better.
“First, be kind to yourself. I hear a lot of people in this situation talking about having poor judgment and making bad decisions, but the truth is that we can’t actually know what something is like until we experience it,” says Emily Frank, founder of the Denver-based career coaching firm Career Catalyst. She adds that it’s especially difficult to make a good prediction because some managers don’t describe the job description clearly throughout the hiring process.
Try to find the silver lining by viewing it as a learning opportunity. “When you find that you don’t like something, even if it’s been a cherished dream, it’s time for introspection, says Frank, “You will probably find that some aspects of the job are still appealing to you and that there are some skills you have enjoyed learning, and that’s important because it will inform what’s next.”
Evaluate your next job carefully:
“Remember the interview isn’t only about the organization getting to know, but it’s also about you getting to know them,’ says Frank. It can be helpful to ask illuminating questions like: What do you like most and least about your job and the company? How would you describe the office culture? What would make someone successful in this role? Get to the interview a few minutes early to observe how coworkers interact and how your would-be-manager treats the people he works with — do people seem happy or like they just want to hide under their desk and cry? Do your due diligence before and after the interview. Talk to current or former employees and see if they’ll spill the tea on what it’s like to work at the company and the pros and cons of your intended role and team. People are more likely to be candid when they don’t work at the company anymore or when the feedback is anonymous.
“We all have to do some work things that we don’t madly love, but life is too short to fill your days with stuff that only brings you down,” says Frank, “Instead, turn your attention to figuring out what actually will bring you satisfaction and the happiness you deserve. It’s way more productive and fun than the alternative.” Figure out what will make you happy and don’t settle.
